Arab Dearborners of the 90’s will recall this little tune from the evening lineup of an Arabic television program broadcasted locally on cable, which was, until the advent of Internet and satellite TV, one of the local Arab community’s links to the Arab world along with several Arabic cable programs that was driven out of business by satellite giants such as Al Jazeera. But ‘Arabic Time’ isn’t just a childhood memory; it’s a code of conduct. It’s a highly precise mode of communication that governs the biological clock of most Arabs from Dearborn. 

So, what do the U.S. and Dearborn Arabs have in common? They both run on their own units of measurements that are detached from the rest of the world,   and of course football and baseball are the sports that distinguish American sports from the rest of the world. Arabs in Dearborn, on the other hand, have their own rule of measurements especially when it comes to ‘Arabic time.’ 

Outsiders, the temporal units of measurement below are important to consider whenever you’re visiting Dearborn to participate in an Arab function there.  Read carefully, and refer to these figures often. Otherwise, you’ll be showing up a half hour early to an event that’s starting an hour and a half late.  

Out of Time:  As a rule of thumb, remember this: ‘Arabic time’ is never on time, and never early. “Seven” means seven thirty, “five,” means six.  Whatever time was agreed upon, show up 20-30 minutes after that. The more momentous the event, the later you should be. For example, be 15 minutes late to a coffee date, but two hours late to a banquet. Below are some exceptions.

Wedding Time:  The invitation says six. It also says don’t bring children. But we know better. The wedding starts at eight, and we’ll show up at seven with the infant under one arm and dragging the toddler with the other. 

Work Time:  Fellow outsider, I hope you never have to work shifts with an Arab from Dearborn. Because unless your clock is a half hour behind when he arrives and a half hour ahead when he leaves, you’re getting an ulcer in no longer than a week. 

Meet-up Time:  If she’s picking you up, she’s going to be late. We’re talking a 30-45 minute delay. If you’re meeting somewhere instead, it’s a 15-30 minute delay. These are pretty accurate estimates, so coordinate accordingly.

Funeral Time: This measurement of time is not as defined. It’s not so much a matter of time as a matter of circumstance. You still must show up late, of course, but the object of your arrival is to be seen and noticed by as many people as possible. Experts usually go for one of two options:

1. Wait until everyone has been seated, the family has been comforted, and the funeral sermons have begun. Then briskly walk in through the central aisle and approach the front where the casket is laid out. Visually express your grief and pity, and then shake hands with everyone in the front row as animatedly as possible with hugs, kisses and some weeping. Walk all the way to the back again, and be seated.   

2. Sit close to the front row, but get up to use the bathroom, get water and coffee, cry, and comfort those around you. Do this every five minutes. ‘Arabic time’ would be every 10 minutes. 

Ramadan is the only exception:  There is one—and I mean only one—exception in ‘Arabic Time.’ That is iftar time in Ramadan. In this single case, Arabic time is very precise. Don’t be early, of course. But you better walk in that door within five minutes of iftar time and not a second later. 

When you do arrive, don’t be alarmed that everyone’s huddled around the heaped dinner table stuffing a handful of dates to their mouths like loaded pistols. Also, disregard that one person may be  off to the side sitting on a tiny crooked rug with his face, hands, and feet damp. That’s called prayer. Muslims are supposed to pray before they break their fast, by the way.  g